Thursday, April 26

cold feet =(

i went to my daughter's new campus for the next school year -middle school- yup! i can't believe i'm gonna have a 7th grader soon. my husband was not able to go coz he gets off late on thursdays so he told me to just update him with everything. nwayz, we had a pre-orientation and believe me i was holding my tears from everything i heard. not that they were bad, but it felt like i wasn't ready for her to grow up that fast. if you have a child and you've experienced sending your kid to school for the very first time... i'm sure you felt sadness deep inside you. well, i felt like that once again. i wasn't expecting that 'till it happened. especially when the principal said "middle school is different from elementary and high school for it's a chapter of many changes and new beginnings in the kids' lives" that, i wanted to just put my head down and cry. gosh! i feel like a dork... crying for everything. i'm sorry, but i believe i was born with emotional disorder... ha!

but may i say that i love the campus! it's a 2 1/2 yr old school... very clean, big and beautiful. they just finished building their football field and i was stunned by the size of it. huge gym i tell yah! camille's so excited with the extra curricular activities they will have like cooking, sewing, drama, dance club & chorus.

anyway, right when i got back in the car i had to hold myself together and just surrender my fears to the Lord. i said a little prayer. a prayer that most mothers would say "Take care of my daughter, Lord!" i went on to tell the Lord everything i felt while i was driving. although i'm not relieved yet, i have to trust the Lord's guidance and plan for my daughter. i have to let go and let God.

what helped me in a way was when i talked to camille right when i got home. she asked why i was crying and i told her the truth. i made her known my piece... "my anxiety attack" hehehe. but it was a good talk. i was able to release my anxiety. i may not know how far she will take my advice, but i will have to put my foot down and let her take on her journey while my husband and i continue to guide her - i do trust her and i know no matter how much my husband and i try to protect our kids... the best protector we have is God and so i leave them all up to the Lord's hands. wouldn't you?

hey, whatever happens... God is good all the time!
ciao!

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